she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
