I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
