Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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