I just made out with a guy for $7.
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
