You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Your topless pictures make me question reality
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Randomize
