Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
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