there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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