True but thats because hes a fetus.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
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