She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
