hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Randomize
