It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
