I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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