Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
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