i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize