everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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