I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
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