she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
Randomize
