he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
I could make wine with my vomit
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
