Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
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