It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
