Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
you made out with another girl for some wings
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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