If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
false alarm. still invincible.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
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