Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
FUCK WHALES
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
