Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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