i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
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