YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
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