I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Randomize
