So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
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