So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
