I want to stick my p in your. b.
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Randomize
