in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Randomize
