porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
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