I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's rum buckets o'clock
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Randomize