She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
Randomize
