Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
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