she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Randomize
