her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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