Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
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