i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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