haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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