And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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