I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
