Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
I didn't notice because vodka
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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