Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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