ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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