Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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