If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
Why is your signature on my underwear?
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
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