I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
4 words: hood of his car
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
Randomize
