I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
