ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
Randomize
