now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
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